Bachelor Sean

A while back, I wrote a post about Emily's season of the Bachelorette where I posted a photo of my cousin Dallin. My cousin is the long lost twin of Bachelor Sean. It's uncanny really. The first time I saw Sean on the screen, both my husband and I saw the crazy resemblance right away. I'll refresh your memory.



Sean, the bachelor

 

My cousin

Which one is which? It's crazy right?
I needed to remind people of this, because I'm can't be 100% certain, but I believe my cousin is available ladies!

Tierra

So I FINALLY got to watch the season premiere of the Bachelor! Last night I was able to see the second episode without any additional Comcast drama. I think he's going to have a great season. Dave and I both agree that he has a good looking bunch of girls. Even Tierra," the crazy one", is pretty. Sean seems WAY into this girl. He gave her a rose one minute after he met her. This is unheard of! I suspect he wants to get into her pants, but they have good "connection" so far. I can't tell yet if the other girls are jealous about that or if she is just a difficult personality. It looks like some serious drama will be coming with her next week.

We also saw the return of Kaci B., previously from Ben's season. Dave was VERY pleased to see her. He has a Bachelor crush on her for sure.He is stunned that she is even on the show, "I seriously doubt she any problem finding a date". He thinks she's good looking but she also has what he refers to as "the cute factor". I take it to mean she has a fun, bubbly personality that makes her adorable to all. Last night was the first time that Dave ever asked me if it bugs me that he thinks she's so cute. Why would I care? You can't be married to someone for a long time and honestly believe that you are the only person your spouse could ever possibly find attractive. Even I think Kaci B. is "Adorbs"! I think she seems like a fun girl and she comes across as a bit more real than some of the other gals.



Kaci B. Proof that my husband isn't blind!

I was pleased to see that my husband still has Zero interest in any blonds and anyone tall (I am fun size and dark haired) This season Sean has a model competing for his heart and she is gorgeous, but Dave made it clear that there is something he just doesn't find attractive about her. He finally pinpointed it by saying, "Maybe she's just too long". I found that hilarious and heart warming. My giant (6'5") likes his women fun size. I can't yet tell if Sean is into the model.


Just from the first two episodes, I have made my predictions for which girls will be left standing at the end. These are premature, but I'm usually right. In addition to the girls below, I hope that Kaci B. is there and there is also a possibility that Tierra will remain as well.

                        Ashlee                                                                                 Desiree

                       Lesley                                                                                   Lindsay
                                                                                       
                                                               
                            

If a Comcast Tire Gets Slashed, I Did It! (Except that I didn't)

 

 

Like any other red blooded American woman, I was so pumped to watch the big season premiere of The Bachelor. My entire day was just that much sweeter because of the anticipation. Who doesn't like having something fun to look forward to? I live for that stuff, the little stuff.

 

So imagine my devastation when I sat down at 9:00 to watch the big show, and I don't find my show title on the stupid DVR list. I was sad, but that quickly turned to rage. Dave was pissed off too, but he talked me off the ledge. This horribleness has happened enough times over the last few years that I have finally learned not to pick up the phone and scream at my local Comcast agent. It gets you no where.

 

I'm aware that we have other viewing options. We can watch it online at ABC.com and we always have Hulu, but damn it all to hell, I wanted to sit on my bed and watch it on the big screen. I pay for that luxury. I want the option to forward through every single commercial, and most of all I wanted to know every last detail about the show this morning. Comcast and their ridiculous "Xfinity" have literally killed my joy.

 

We had no other choice but to watch a bizarre Netflix movie instead. We watched Savages and I didn't really like it. Maybe it was all the awkward porn like moments of the movie, or maybe it was just my depression over missing the first episode of The Bachelor. Comcast can never make it up to me. I'm that disgruntled. Hopefully we can avoid a mishap like this next week.

 



Where do you even find a guy like that?

I loved the Bachelorette finale!  I didn't see any of that coming.  Emily had her last date with sweet Jef and she let him meet her daughter.  It went so well and she felt so good about it, that she didn't even have her last date with Arie.  She told him she'd already made up her mind about Jef and she let him leave before the final day.  I thought she made a great decision.  My husband was shocked because Emily was always making out with  Arie and Dave just assumed that she'd choose him.  They had plenty of chemistry and it was obvious.  She had really strong feelings for Jef too, but the physical side was not as overwhelmingly obvious on camera.  If Emily was just a single, childless gal, I'm certain she would have chosen Arie.  Her practical, mother side led her to choose Jef.  He will be a great husband.  He will be a fantastic dad, and I believe he'll commit to all of those things sooner than later.  She made a great choice, and I'm glad she made the choice with her head and her heart, rather than with just her lady bits (if ya know what I mean). 

I don't know if men know about that side of women?  There's that age old cliche about men having two brains, one upstairs and one downstairs.  Well I firmly believe that women are the same way when it comes to their  decisions about men.  This is why we all know at least one young lady who is dating a jerk that doesn't deserve her yet.  Girls  also make rotten relationship decisions based solely on physical attraction and that crazy chemistry.  I vividly recall myself and many of my girlfriends having at least one "boyfriend" (we all know what I really mean by that word) that was amazing, but not even remotely falling into the category of relationship /marriage material.  Sometimes physical chemistry can over power all your sensibilities.  What can I say?  It happens.  The best you can hope for is a few moments of clarity where you recognize that you'll  be needing a lot more than just chemistry if you want a lasting marriage. 

I don't mean any disrespect to Arie on this.  He's awesome!  On After the Final Rose, he admitted that he was so heart broken that he flew to Emily's hometown and left a journal, that he'd kept during the filming of the Bachelorette, on her door step.  He thought that if she just read his candid thoughts and feeling about falling in love with her, that she'd understand his love and change her mind.   I was blown away by that.  I loved it.  Where do you find a guy like that?  That was so romantic and sweet.  I've never even seen that move in a movie.  Emily didn't read it, out of respect for her new fiance, and she kindly returned it to him, letting him know that no good could come from her reading it.  Still, I thought the gesture was so tender.  I momentarily wondered if I screwed up my dating years by not being a botoxed, blond with fake boobs and fake teeth?  Where did I go wrong?  Dave did some super sweet things that sealed the deal for us when we were dating, but Arie went above and beyond and he wasn't even the best guy there.  Jef is out of this world great.

I've been married for 10 years and honestly I don't even know what criteria you should use when choosing the person you'll marry, but I feel like it has to be more than just that weak in the knees, butterflies in your stomach stuff. Although that stuff is is some of the best stuff in the world.  I think Emily feels like that for Jef too, and he just seems like the safer bet out of the two of those remaining guys.   I hope it works out for Emily and Jef.  All that being said, I am so pumped for the premiere of Bachelor Pad.  I very much look forward to eight weeks of debauchery!

The Finale is on SUNDAY!

Saturday morning has just begun and it looks like it's going to be a gorgeous day, but mentally, I just want it to hurry up and end, so that Sunday can begin!  I can't wait for the Bachelorette finale.  The previews give nothing away and I just can't wait to see how it all ends.

Usually the previews will show little hints or clues that the well trained eye can pick up on,  but not this time.  It doesn't even show a single clip of Emily waiting nervously for her final guy to show up and receive his final rose.  This in unheard of, so I am left to believe that this may very well be the "most dramatic ending in bachelorette history."  Host Chris Harrison is gonna love saying that phrase every ten minutes of the finale.  It's going to be great!

Will she choose Salt Lake City Jef with one "f"?  Or will it be the obvious choice for her, Arie the race car driver?  I like them both.  Jef is quirky and hilarious.  He is so different than the typical bachelor guy and he seems so sweet.  Arie has the whole "racing" thing going for him though.  I rarely ever watch racing, so I'm not sure why that's hot, but of course it is.   Dave thinks Emily only likes Arie because he's a race car driver.  I'm sure it adds to his appeal, but I thinks he's very likable even without it.  My husband wishes ALL the guys would have been race car drivers just to make it that much more difficult for her.

For the first time in a long time, I don't have a clear cut opinion on who she should choose.  Oh, I am just so excited to watch it and find out what happens!!!   The best part of this brand new Sunday night finale format is that I will only have to wait 24 hours for the premiere of Bachelor Pad!  There isn't going to be even one depressing, bachelor-less, Monday night.  This is a dream come true!

I love being so easily entertained.  I pay good money for that HD receiver and it pays me back every week.  It's like Christmas morning happens 25 times a year for me.  This is the benefit of not being above this sort of entertainment.  The Bachelor Franchise has my number for sure.   I hope they continue making these grand scale dating shows until the day I die.  I love all the drama and I appreciate every ones effort in bringing it to me!  Sunday night  can't get here fast enough!

Bachelorette Boy Jef (with one F)

Well what do you know, Jef with one "f" is really growing on me.  I loved his hometown date with Emily on last nights episode of the Bachelorette.  He took her to his families ranch in St. George, Utah and their date was awesome.  I'm not just saying this because he's the Utah guy and I'm from Utah.  I really like this guy.   He's getting better every week.

He had a great date planned.  He took her for a ride in a Razor (a four wheeler with seats that goes really fast!), which looked like tons of fun.  Next they shot at clay pigeons.  They were both excellent shots and Emily seemed very impressed with Jef's shooting skills.  I loved when she said something along the lines of, "Look at you shooting guns all manly in your skinny jeans."  The date was perfect and he was really showing her a new side of him.  I liked it a lot and honestly I would have had such a good time on a date like that.

Then of course she had to meet like four of his 500 siblings.  They all seemed nice enough.  I don't know if it's just my trained Utah eye or what, but the siblings were TURBO mormon.  Dave even noticed that they had the mormon look and accent.  I'm not saying that this is a positive or a negative, I'm just saying it's strangely obvious and I wonder if people outside of this state see it?   I even got the inside scoop from my cousin that Jef's folks are on a morman mission and Jef went on one as well.  I guess he isn't into it anymore, but I hope Emily is aware of all this.  If she ends up with him, it will make her integration into his family a bit tougher than she might think. 

All that being said though, I think that their relationship is really progressing.  He read her the SWEETEST letter that he wrote to her on his plane ride home from Prague (the last date city).  I think he's very different from the other guys.  He's very likable and he seems like a lot of fun to be around.  I don't know if she wants to get it on with him, but if she does, they might have a great time as a couple.  Plus, I would love it if bachelorette Emily chose Jef and moved to Salt Lake.  I would love to go shopping downtown and run into her at the MAC counter or something. 

The other two guys are great as well.  Shawn's family seemed great.  His dad was awesome.  He'd make a great father-in-law.  I think Emily felt very comfortable with them.  Ari's parents seemed sort of weird.  Almost like they are off in outer space.  I got super annoyed when Ari's mom just started speaking Dutch in front of Emily.  It was beyond rude.  Who does that?   I'm just so excited for next weeks episode!  I love the fantasy dates every season.  I am counting the seconds until next Monday night.

Bachelorette Look Alikes

I loved when I found the photo of Bachelor Ben next to a photo of Francine from Arthur.  Ben had reminded me of someone else all season long and I just couldn't figure it out on my own.  Someone else did the leg work on that one and I was forever grateful.  I mean seriously, is this not perfect?

 I have yet another fella from the show that looked so familiar and yet I just couldn't place it.  I re-watched Monday nights Bachelorette episode, with my husband who'd missed it, and it all came together.  I studied Ryan (goose egg haircut guy) and all at once it hit me!  Take and look and tell me if didn't NAIL this one.


The grown up version is Ryan.  The kid version would clearly be Little Critter!

Ryan as a child....Little Critter!

 I'm so relieved that I can stop trying to solve that mystery and just enjoy the show.


There is one other guy whom I adore and it took me no time at all to recognize who he reminds me of.   I think Shawn is great and I really hope Emily chooses him in the end.  I didn't notice him much at first, but he is moving to the head of the pack every week.  If you recall, all of Emily's girlfriends really took a liking to Shawn.  I'm sure those positive comments about Shawn have a lot of weight in Emily's opinion of him.  Dave and I noticed right away that Shawn look a lot like my cousin.  He's sort of a hybrid mix of two brothers but he reminds me most of this cousin in particular.  Am I crazy here or is Shawn the long lost son of my aunt and uncle?




Shawn from the Bachelorette

My handsome cousin

Emily, You're Growin' On Me

So glad I gave the boring bachelorette another chance.  Not every gal can be a firecracker, or the world would blow up!  She finally got to go out on some dates and show a bit more of who she is.  I LOVED that her first date, with Ryan the guy with the goose egg hair do, involved carrying her groceries into her house and making cookies.  Not a helicopter in sight!  She was dressed down in adorable everyday clothes and she looked so cute.  I prefer this side of her because it's normal and relatable.  I can't recall the last time I wore a beauty pagent gown.......no wait, I can.  It was my wedding.

Emily is officially growing on me.  She's asking the hard hitting questions and eliminating guys based on their answers.  I think she'll find a good guy.  Her choices seem better now that we're starting to see some individual personalities. 

I am proud to say that so far my instincts have been spot on.  Ryan, Jef (with one F from Utah) and Arie the race car driver all got roses and I still predict they will go far.  I like Arie a lot.  I hope he gets a one on one date next week.  It looked like it from the preview.  He seems like a strong contender for the final rose!

After the show, Dave and I had a good laugh about these shows.  I love them, but I think it's hilarious that shows like this make Marriage look like the finish line.  As if getting married is the final prize!
"Look, you did it!  You won!  It's all smooth sailing from here on out.  Now just sit back, relax and have fun tolerating this person for the REST OF YOUR LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!"

    In reality, the wedding is the start of the longest, most grueling Iron Man triathlon on the planet.  It's all so easy when it's fresh and new.  The hard part happens when "people stop being nice and start being real"!  (thank you MTV's Real World for wording it so well)  Real life happens and it can put a damper on things really quickly.   Add some long hours at work, some screaming kids, a few overflowing baskets of unfolded laundry and a tight budget to the mixture and hope for the best!

We'll just keep quiet about all that for now and enjoy watching people on television continue their quest for the ultimate prize.....a spouse!  It's comical and somehow it makes for some highly entertaining viewing pleasure.  Go Emily, Go!

Emily, The Bachelorette

I love the Bachelor/ Bachelorette.  It's always compelling television, but I'm worried this season is going to be dull.  Emily is a little boring.  I guess some people think she's the most beautiful bachelorette in the history of the show, but I'm not so sure.  She is pretty, but she looks much older than 26, in my humble opinion.  She is very blonde with, what have to be, fake teeth.  Dave doesn't think she's cute or appealing at all.  I should be very flattered, because I have dark hair and real teeth.......  With shows like these, pretty only gets you so far (hello Gia the gorgeous swim suit model who was out done by Vienna!).  I'm looking for a great personality and lots of it. 
I loved Jillian.  She was really cute, and she had a great personality to go with it.  I have no interest in watching some D-bag adore a pretty lady robot.  I want depth (duh, that's why I'm watching such a deep show).
At first glance, Dave and I both agreed that Emily has slim pickins.  The guys are not super great....yet.  Personalities will emerge and hopefully I'll be drawn in.  Dave fell asleep!  On the first night!  This does not bode well for Emily or for my joyous Monday night ritual of watching my show with Dave by my side.
That being said, here are the three fellas of interest for me.  This first dude is named Ryan.  The internet told me his name.  I called him Eff'd up haircut and it's obvious why I call him that.  It looks a tiny bit better in this photo, but on the show last night, it looked like his mom did a hack job on him in her garage, and like he has a massive goose egg on the top of his head.  The dude should have a severe concussion from the size of that goose egg.  He needs an MRI immediately!

Ryan

This guy is from the south, like Emily and if somebody gives him $5 and a ride to Dollar Cuts, he might be a contender.  We'll see how it goes.  Good lord that hair cut is a mess!

The next guy is from Utah, my home state.  He is not my favorite, but Emily thinks he's "cool" and he might be, but again he has a wacky hair do.  Maybe that's her thing.  I hope it is, because a lot of her potential suitors have dumb hair cuts.  This guy, Jef with one F, rode in on a skate board and Emily thought that was cute.  He seems nice enough so hopefully he'll make it for a few more episodes.

Jef

This haircut would not have gotten a passing grade in clipper class at the beauty college.  I just want to blend that left side.  It's painful for me to watch!
Last, but certainly not least, we have Arie, the race car driver.  Emily was engaged to a race car driver who was killed in a plane crash, so I thought she'd struggle with his profession, but she seemed to find the whole thing to be really hot.  Who can blame her?  This guy is sort of a fox and he does look really good in his race car.  I believe it's Indy car racing, if Nascar has a negative connotation for you.  I watched some Nascar with Dave a week ago and I was into it.  The last 30 minutes were intense!

Arie

So here is 30 year old Arie.  The shape of his hair cut could use some work, but that texture can be hard to handle.  All in all, I think he's good lookin' and Emily loves a fella in a fast car.  I predict these men will go far.  Now I have to watch to see how it all pans out.

After The Final Train Wreck (or final rose)

Wow, thank you US Weekly for totally wrecking the final episode of the Bachelor. I 100% knew who Ben would pick and it made all the Lindsey scenes unbearable to watch. Normally I can't watch Lindsey because of her voice and her make-up, but this was much worse. That poor girl was so set up for failure and she didn't even know it. I love how she said, "Well, call me if it doesn't work out." after he told her he wasn't choosing her. That alone is a great predictor of Ben's future.
Speaking of Ben, he sure did look like shit on After the Final Rose. A little piece of advice to all the fellas out there, if your "beard" looks like something a 13 year old boy could grow, you need to shave. I understand that he wants to distance himself from looking so much like Francine from the cartoon "Arthur", but he looked awful. And seriously, what is this stupid haircut? I can't deal with it anymore. It is so not attractive and he clearly needs a trim. If I can see your split ends on my crappy ass Vizio television, that's a problem. Also, is Ben's sister 9 months pregnant of is she just a huge fan of the worlds most unflattering sweaters? I don't get it.
All that being said, I sure hope Ben and Courtney enjoy all six weeks of their doomed romance. The upside of all of this is that I can't wait to see them end up on my future dream cast of Bachelor Pad. Move over Vienna, Courtney is ready to take your spot as most annoying Bachelor Pad contestant EVER!

The Bachelor Drama

Let me start by saying that Ben is a surprisingly good bachelor. He's not the hottest guy on the planet but he is more aware of what's going on than the traditional stupid bachelor. He seems to have that extra sense that most men don't have. Ben thinks about his next move more than most men do. And I love that he almost never says the word "journey". I despise that word and this show tends to bring that word up quite a bit. In a nutshell, I like Ben. You can tell he's a pretty good guy and he's looking for more than a nice rack. It's refreshing.

The villain is now obviously Courtney. At first sight, I thought that she was really pretty. She sort of looks like she could be Selena Gomez's older sister. I love Selena Gomez (I have two young daughters and Selena makes clean music that makes me dance), so that made me think that Courtney might be alright. WRONG! Once she started speaking, it all went to hell in a handbag for me. She is always doing weird shit with her face, almost like her lips are numb or she has some weird nervous tick where her mouth just moves out of control. She also has that "I'm a model, so I'm way better than everyone else attitude". That alone is obnoxious, add to that her strange puckered mouth and her head jerking and it's just too much. Ben is still in the honeymoon phase of infatuation with her, so I don't think he notices these things about her. A few months of her twitching would probably start to annoy him. Dave can't handle it at all. It drives him crazy and every time she does it, he looks over at me and asks me to imitate her. He gets a kick out of my Courtney impression.

Now it's time to address the elephant in the room.... Courtneys blatant attempts to go skinny dipping with Ben. I love that he shut her down on the group date. He KNEW that going there would be trouble and most certainly it would ruffle a lot of the other girls feathers. I don't picture Brad Womack having that same understanding of the potential damage it could cause. So Ben shuts her down on the group date. I loved it. I love when Ben swears in frustration at the camera. It's the best part of the show, no doubt. So then he gets stuck taking Elyse (Jersey Shore) out on the yacht for her one on one date. It goes sour really quick and he gives her the boot. He heads back to his hotel room and what do you know, villain Courtney is waiting for him in her robe, with two wine glasses. CHEESY! She works her magic and gets into Ben's room. The stupid shit she says once she's in there is to dumb to repeat. I threw up in mouth just hearing her say it the first time. So, somehow or another, they end up out on the beach and she convinces him it's time to skinny dip in Puerto Rico. She gets naked and away they go. I don't hate on Ben for going along with this. He is, after all, a single horny dude and what does he stand to lose by giving it a go? Maybe he got a handy out of it, who knows. He later says something cryptic about how they shared an intimate moment. He played it well, because he got some sexy time with a lady he likes and the other women were none the wiser. He's single. It was gross to watch, but I'm not a player hater. Well played Ben.

So onto the rose ceremony. I won't say who went home cause I've already forgotten her name, (the redhead he likes makin' out with) but I will say I was surprised she got the boot. She seemed to take the bad news well. She walked out to the exit vehicle and behaved like the classy, put together lady that she is. They say their goodbyes and there aren't any tears. She holds it together and gets in the car for her exit interview. So the second she gets in the car, she loses it big time, crying like a fool. My theory is that the camera man and the driver are wearing gas masks because the vehicle is clearly being pumped full of tear gas. That is the only explanation for the sob fest that begins in that car. And I would guess that she is being questioned like this, "So Sally, Ben hates you and he thinks you're ugly and unlovable. Any reaction to that? By the way Sally, both of your cats got hit by a car right before the rose ceremony. We didn't want to tell you until now. You do realize that this was your last chance for romance and this means you'll die childless and alone Sally. How does that make you feel? Ben said he would have proposed to you if you would have just touched his weiner a little on your date. You blew it big time Sally, any thoughts? By the way honey, I should warn you that your make-up is going to look awful in High Definition and this camera will add ten pounds, minimum. Go ahead and cry Sally. Let it all out."

The Bachelor

I love watching the Bachelor. Believe it or not, this is not one of my SHAME shows. I watch it with pride and I wake up Monday morning with a smile on my face, because I am so pumped that it's Bachelor Monday! My husband loves this day too. He likes the show, but he loves to watch me watch the show. I am totally in my element. It's just great T.V. The women are trying to impress and be on their best behavior, but they can only put on the show for so long, and then shit gets real. Women aren't crazy, they are emotional and it's real. They go on this show and they want to find "love", but more than anything they want to WIN. The lines get crossed so completely. The type of women that ends up on the show are usually in their mid-twenties and most of them have never been married and they still believe so intensely in the fairytale of it all. It's like they've been window shopping for love and marriage. They've all seen what they think it looks like and what they think it must feel like, but they've never been in the store, so they don't really know what it is that they are shopping for. They've never felt if the fabric is soft or itchy? Does is smell nice or does it stink like silk? Most importantly, does it fit? Could you live in this beautiful thing you've seen through the window? They don't know, and they don't care. They want to be chosen. It sounds so stupid and so competitive, but that's all it is. They just want this one man to chose them instead of the other 24 girls. They want to feel special. EVERY woman everywhere wants to feel special. Singled out as "the one". I sit at home (with my husband no less) and giggle as I watch it happening, but I understand what they are looking for. The fact that there are 25 women to one man makes it extreme and over-the-top and ultimately VERY ENTERTAINING. The women are basically trying to sell themselves (not like prostitutes) and their best qualities to this man, just hoping that they will be chosen. To be chosen on television is the ultimate prize. It tells every ex-boyfriend, every old crush, every bitch from your high school that you are valuable. You are worthy. You are SPECIAL. Now try not to watch that. It's hard to turn away.
The next spin off show should absolutely be about what happens AFTER you are chosen.... That's when it really gets interesting. Are you glad this dude chose you? That show would be called "Married Life. Am I certain this is what I wanted?"